Friday, 7 November 2008

Custody of my youngest son....

I have repeatedly asked my kid's mother if I could have joint custody of our three children. She refused.

My youngest bloke is mildly disabled. He has Asperger's Syndrome. In some things he is not aspie; in other things most definitely!

I have organised training for him; coaching; social skills; physical skills; have monitored his progress and organised meetings with his professionals and at the school. Made certain his mother was invited to all these.

Consistently, over the years, even though she had custody, she would not follow up with his homework, home training, or follow ups.

HOW INCREDIBLY FRUSTRATING! Yet she had full say as to whether I could get him more often, or not.

I am now taking her to court, because she refuses to discuss it, to attempt to get custody in these important years.

I am almost certain to be unsuccessful. He will say he doesn't want to change his routine - because kids rarely do; my place will mean more homework; Asperger's kids don't like change.

But I need to try. I have watched my two eldest atrophy in their skill levels. I wont watch that happen with the youngest bloke without a fight.

We had to appear in court and are now being assessed by a Social Worker / Psychologist.

In my submission to the court I spoke about his needs and how they were not being addressed or supported. In her reply, she spoke about how our 8 years ago marriage was torture and that I, fundamentally, was a very poor father. Then and now.

I am certain you would understand how hurtful that is - I firmly believe, however, totally unnecessary and missing the point.

The point is, the young bloke and his shot at an independent, self-determining life.

Whatever happens, I am committed to that!

Monday, 3 November 2008

Landmark as a Cult?

I have told a lot of my friends about Landmark - I have "Googled" it, as they have.

I am reminded about a wise saying - "If a hypocrite stands between you and God, it means they are closer to God than you are."

Landmark is not a cult. It is not a religion. It can become a way of life for some.

It is not even the truth - it is just a way of looking at the world and the human experience.

I can say I have met some people who have lived and breathed Landmark. I can say I have met some people who are THOROUGHLY into it.

I cannot say, however, I have met one single person at Landmark who is insincere.

While I am not thoroughly embracing the philosophy and all the views, I have gotten a huge amount from it. Continue to get a lot from it.

People invariably find what they are looking for - what they focus on. Rather than look for reasons not to do it, consider looking for the way you would like your life to be different.

There is a real possibility, that some of the tools they equip you with, will assist you to make your different life a reality, in some small way.

Landmark lecture Series - 2nd impression

OK so I have moderated my thoughts on the lecture series.

I am particularly impressed by the sincerity of the leader of my series.

In the sea of chat, some ideas floated by that are incredibly helpful.

I can't share them with you because I made a "personal use" promise I intend to keep.

Once again, I found these ideas profoundly helpful.

I'll keep this blog posted.